THE BEREAN SCRIBE- THE CASE FOR MODESTY- A ROAD LESS TRAVELLED

A little while back, i was pretty intense about the topic of modesty; how a woman dressed and what was appropriate for a  daughter of Christ.  I have a note called Letter to my Unborn, and i was actually told i was naive, for expecting chastity and purity from a woman in the 21st century BY A WOMAN, Who went me it was unrealistic to think that an adult woman wouldn't have been with a few men by the time she in her early twenties. Pardon me for wanting the absolute best for my daughter. And somehow i don't think God is going to accept "It's the 21st century" as an excuse for not living up to the standards of purity that he has of us.

So why am i so adamant on the issue of modesty? Well i believe in sowing and reaping, if you plant an acorn you'd be foolish to expect a pine tree to grow.

I'm going to be a father, uncle, God father to a beautiful young woman someday, and i want a young man in her generation and circle of friends, to take this same stance. Despite the fact that society expects him to encourage and lust after it.

A statement i heard from a guy last year, though i do not totally agree with it really says a lot about the perception many guys have out there "what a woman in willing to show , she's willing to share"  After hearing that i placed it as a status update , and i got several messages proclaiming it untrue. And after following my cries for women to dress more modestly and cover up their bosoms. I was further told that "no matter what a woman wears some men will lust. TRUE
But look at it this way

Toby has a golden retriever called Brody. Brody is the friendliest Dog on the planet. and everybody absolutely loves him. So one day sees something in a movie and he decided to stat buying raw steaks soaked in blood for Brody. After two months of this Brody has acquired a taste for blood, and noone could blame him when he took a big wet bite out of Toby's you know what.  Was Brody responsible for his own actions, yes, would it have happened if Toby hadn't raised an appetite for blood, not likely.

Culture whether it be the TV shows from 90210, SATC,Nip Tuck Bold & Beautiful , that have the characters hopping from bed to bed with no consequences, and then trotting down the streets in fabulous clothes , We have picked up those ideals and whether we realize it or not subconsciously apply them to our lives.

It almost impossible to even watch a Disney cartoon now without the female characters exposing cleavage. Don't believe me!!! Go back and check Snow White, Cinderella,Belle(Beauty &the Beast) and the more recent The Princess and the frog. Should little children be exposed to so much skin even if it's animated. Is that the example for little girls and expectation for little boys. I'll let you be the judge of that.

You think I've gone too far , it's too little to worry about ? If you think little things like that don't matter, you obviously have never been bitten by a mosquito.

But that's enough of my opinion.What does the Bible say

1 TIMOTHY 2:9
And i want women to be modest in their appearance.They should wear decent and appropriate clothing and not draw attention to themselves………

MATTHEW 18:7 How terrible it will be for anyone who causes others to sin. Temptation is inevitable,but how terrible it will be for the person who does the tempting

ROMANS 12:1

Therefore i beseech you brethren that you present your bodies a living sacrifice , Holy and acceptable unto God which is your reasonable service

1 CORINTHIANS 6:1

Don't you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, .... For we are the temple of the living God; just as God said, "I WILL DWELL IN THEM .... ..

PROVERBS 7:1-27 The Proverb of the Immoral Woman.

Contrary to popular belief, she was not a prostitute. She was a married woman with too much time on her hands after the day time soaps. He husband was away on business , she she decided to wear a hot lil number and seduce a young man back to her bed.

 

Too many of our choices are affected by social proof. We look around to see what everyone else(society) is doing and we determine our next move by that. Our clothing choices are made by what is popular, what would draw the most attention to us, and a lot of the time by what celebrities are wearing.

Ladies have more precision in the choice of clothes they wear than men do. They praise, asses and judge themselves and each other by their clothing. The  desire to look attractive and turn heads is natural. everyone want to be noticed and acknowledges. But there is a vast difference between being attractive respectively, and being sensual thereby raising a sexual appetite in the men around them.

Now , many are not aware of this, they might actually just love the figure hugging dress, without knowing what it does to the men around them.

Let's take a hypothetical situation.

SCENARIO 1
Kevin is a dynamic guy. He's funny and at the same time carries a sense about him that disarms even the most frosty of people. He also have a love for scripture and leaves you spellbound in his exposition of Bible passages. The past six months in fellowship have been amazing and you are learning so much from him, you wonder how come his head hasn't exploded from carrying such spiritual insight.

Summer comes round and away go the coats , out come the shades, shorts and t shirts. Looking sharp as always he wears a track suit top and jeans. You say hi before service and you tell him you want to get some of his thoughts on a particular passage you've been studying. He agrees and you plan to meet after service.

Service is going great and due to all the dancing and the heat generated, Kevin takes off his track top to reveal a bleach white T Shirt. You do a double take when you see what's inscribed on it  .

A giant red arrow pointing to his crotch with the words JOYSTICK in bold black letters. Shocked you have to wipe your eyes to make sure you are seeing clearly.

The next week he has a shirt that says NICE LEGS, WHAT TIME DO THEY OPEN

Now, how would that affect your perception of Kevin? Would you say those shirts speak a little about his state of mind. Would you consider a little bit inappropriate for him to wear that to church or as a Christian?

If he told you "it's just a cool T Shirt, i couldn't resist"  what would you think of that reasoning.


HOLD THAT THOUGHT

SCENARIO 2
Jennifer, wears a sexy dress that accentuates her hour glass body, the top shows just a little bit of cleavage ,but nothing too serious, unless she bends over, which has no intention of doing. She comes to church and she sits opposite Raymond. Raymond just became a christian 3 years ago.

As a teenager he had lived promiscuously and dabbled in pornography. He's let his eyes linger on girls bodies, watching the jog in the park, and he'd plan how he'd bed them, which he usually succeeded . But since becoming a christian he has put that life behind him. He doesn't party anymore, has cancelled his cable, and when he's not a work he at home or in church spending time in the word. But now he's at church were he's meant to feel safe.

And there, Jennifer is there directly opposite him. Her plunging neckline and curvaceous catches his eyes and he has to remind himself that he's not meant to look. he turns his head, but to his left and right are other girls, that wanted to feel sexy that day too. Raymond goes home frustrated, but he made it through. He fights those impure thoughts that try to rise, those plotting he would have done in the past. His ex girlfriend shows up for a visit and one thing leads to another. His former nature connects all the dots, already in a weakened state and he falls into sin.

Now, did Jennifer intend to do this. Probably not. She may have just really liked that dress, or just wanted a Jennifer looks great today  But dressing in an immodest way. Her desire to look sexy and showing off what should have remained covered acted as a catalyst for lust in Raymond's life. Raymond was responsible for his own action and choices, but the lust triggered by Jennifer's choice of clothes. 


CATALYST

1) A substance that increases the rate of a chemical reaction without itself undergoing any permanent chemical change

2) A person or thing that precipitates an event

"Purity of motive does not  cancel the effect of your appearance"

A revealing dress is like the season preview for a hit tv show, or the trailer for the most anticipated summer movie. Anyone that has seen the trailer to great TV show or movie knows how their appetite has been wet and their eagerly wait to see the whole thing.

No matter how Holy a man is, there is not OFF switch to his hormones, he just works hard at keeping them at bay, and avoiding triggers. Even David , a man after God's own heart fell, but you have to wonder what a married woman was doing bathing publicly where anyone could see her.

On some level we are communicating by how we dress- Al Mohler- Discerning your Culture

NOW , no one is saying that it's a sin to look or be sexy, but deliberately setting out in a sensual appearance is not only sinful, but it's asking for trouble. No one is suggesting that Christian girls should dressed like Nuns, Amish or like Ninja's covering from head to toe. It is possible to absolutely gorgeous wearing a t shirt and jeans. The truth which most guys would admit is that , the very same smoking hot girl in the halter top that they date and show off to all their friends, they either never take her home to mom, or they will require a serious wardrobe change before they do.

Do guys around you have to pull a Joseph because they want to avoid impure thoughts?

Those that don't pull a Joe, do they have anything else staring back at them other than your eyes?

If placed in a Usual Suspects type line up, would you stand out from the girls that are out there to seduce or those looking for a quick roll in the hay, and thus dress to attract guys with the same desire?

Are you more like Esther or Delilah in your dressing?

Do you strengthen the character and spiritual growth of the men around you, or are you causing their resolve to weaken?

Ever wonder why that friend of yours keeps on attracting horny losers. She may want to check the way she dresses.

Modesty goes beyond dressing, and is also about the way a woman carries and presents herself. A flirtatious ,sensual or provocative aura, even while covered head to toe is asking for the wrong type of attention.

So let's even forget about men. Does you dressing honor God?

If Jesus showed up and wanted to take you to dinner, Would you be ready to go immediately or would you have to go change? How long would it take you to find an appropriate dress or gown?

Would you even be able to open the door for him or tell him to wait while you run to go throw on a sweater or a shawl to cover up your modesty.

The answer to those questions should be the determining factor in how choices are made in  appearance.

This note is not about pointing fingers , i write with the best intentions I'd want someone to say these things to my daughter or niece in my absence. Therefore I'm paying it forward